Worship
Worship must have been
Brutal, then
Fierce dancing to fierce rhythm
All sorts of things prepared
To sacrifice to God
Where the divine had any interest
In such rites
(how did they know?)
Ready to let blood
Human wine
For penance and redemption
In the world where crops were
Eradicated too easily
Enemies banded ‘round to take out
Any towns or collections of
Humanity trying to set along
The river’s edge or in the center of
Even a place of hiding
Too easily exposed
Or maybe it was grand
A city on a hill
Still the gods need something of us
To turn attention there
To give us weather
Or health enough
To go another year
No notion of indifference
A neatly civilized invention
The worship here
Must match
Barbaric nature with the
Barbaric parts of us
There was awful authenticity
Because the only choice
Was awe
This was a fearful task
Reaching a god
To know its name
To know what it wants
Or left to guessing the rituals
Demanded in a world of
Circling barbarity
With no neat form, no room for
Showing up
Life was on the line
To hope in every baleful way
That God might answer
We don’t want it back
Why should we?
Though we’ve lost the awe
In awesome,
The part that means to fear the Lord
Not as in scared
(though that)
But in respect that God is there
Might be set over a scale
Might be listening
Not for what’s refined
Something that’s raw
As from the scoured human heart
The table might be symbol
But inside, where the marks are
God can reside
Wildly there
So what do we do
At evening or at sunrise?
Or when we feel we’ve wakened up
Enough?
We can find God
Too easily
Before we’re ready
We might have a sibling conflict
Or no notion of our Sunday best
God will take us on
Together, one by one
Maybe not fierce worship
But something honest
Tears rather than
Blood
Focus rather than rage
Though through it all, whatever,
Love as well as fear
For God is God
Not wanting us to quake
Perhaps
But recalling first obedience
Afterward, attending
To the second
Have worship, then
Leave afterward
Taking something of the altar
With you
Like a burning coal set inside
Something that will never burn
Away,
The part of God that’s present
Not without expectation
Not always well-behaved
But always loved
Come back to me
Come back again
I am with you now
C L Couch
Photo by Paweł Czerwiński on Unsplash
April 30, 2020 at 2:57 am
Hey. I enjoyed your piece your journey through gods, sacrifices, early religion, to a more civilized one. But I think the end that ties up your blog: “ The part of God that’s present /Not without expectation /Not always well-behaved / But always loved / Come back to me / Come back again / I am with you now,” sums up this journey. Perhaps that our God, the Christian God, has always existed and remains when these other gods/goddesses have come and gone, that life is a treasure and when it feels like hell God calls us back to Him, and let’s us know we are never alone.
Really great stuff. I know for me this hits home “I am with you know” — “Lo, I am with you, even unto the very end of the age.”
April 30, 2020 at 3:25 pm
Thank you, Amanda! I was wondering about worship past and present. Thinking where the ancient fear of God might not be amiss today at least in terms of having deep respect. And in terms of our finding our agenda in God rather than the other way around. But God is with us, thankfully, in all things.
Yes, God is eternal. As for other gods, C S Lewis and J R R Tolkien have written effectively about this–about the truth of God in all traditions.
May 1, 2020 at 9:07 pm
You’re very right I think one of my dream vacations is to go to Oxford and see where Lewis, Carole, and Tolkien all studied together mythology and more in their writing. And you’re right fear of the Lord is not a bad thing as the bible says, it’s the start of wisdom.
Stay well 🙂
May 2, 2020 at 12:01 am
That IS a dream vacation!