(x = space)
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first holy saturday
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it seems there’s nothing
but a void
after which is fear
there could be doubt
but what is left
to believe in
first
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the body’s cared for
there’s the irony of a guard
to keep things safe
while making sure
we don’t get in
to take him
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so what is left
but us
and an enormous world
ready to quash us
and to take our air
our allotment of
anything
allowed
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we have gone too far
they’ll say
but we have killed the head
and now the serpent
body dies
and we shall have it
or leave it
shriveling in the shadows
or bring it to the light
to finish
dessication
and metaphors aside
we mean you
and to have you
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your paltry movement
and there are many crosses
provided by the Romans
and the Greeks
and Egyptians
before
x
you are done
we shall have you
you are annihilated
not even space on Earth
shall have you
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we can delight
considering
a line of graves
underneath the field
that we buy
with the silver
Judas has returned
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well
not well
and so we hide
small care for each other
we dare to send for food
and prepare it
without fire
to share it in the dark
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these are holy hours
we try
to pay attention
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some count the hours
most of us
cannot do
something so constructive
x
it is finished
last words
we heard them
so did they
we wait for
we don’t know what
we have forgotten all the miracles
and all of what was said
to go with them
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we hide
and that’s the hell of it
as it seems
that hell has won
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there is the edge
of a hole
through which we see
what we have been taken from
and shall we try
to return
a circle
an eye
we hurt
wait, an eye
who sees
we see
does God look at us
or Rome
or the Sanhedrin
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how can God look
God died yesterday
we saw
we heard
and it is terrible
but there’s nothing more
even from the cross
were the words
that it is finished
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we can’t even wait
we can count the hours
but there’s nothing there
there is grief
the rightness of it
rituals
for a while
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but then there’s nothing left
we are ridiculed
then captured
captured and then ridiculed
when it’s safe
when we are bound
bound perhaps
to crosses of our own
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why do we even have
this day
it is a holy day
so to say
holy hours
holy minutes
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if yesterday
had been the day
if the cross beam was
a blooded lintel
then the deadly angel
missed
or misread
and took
the righteous
anyway
against the plan
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but it’s not fair
to miscast angels
who are commanded
by a God
who let
if not arranged for
all of this
and now has disappeared
gone to Sheol
though how can God
wait for God
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there are no answers
only rumors
that we cannot hear
the world has closed us off
in here
and we will not snipe
or bear false hope
or cheat
material truth
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while we are waiting
worse than that
having nothing
to wait for
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we mourn
we cannot look
or look
taste and see
we miss our God
we were friends of God
for a little while
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we are lost
after our paroxysms
maybe we
catch our breath a little
and shall we go where
we proclaimed it long ago
that without God
there is nowhere
the nowhere of the Sadducees
maybe
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but on to night
and after night
not daylight
but a void
judgment perhaps
but what could we have done
when we were told
what we were told
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friendship for hours only
new love
and now
it’s as if creation
matter
molecules
might as well
have never happened
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C L Couch
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Photo by Filip Kominik on Unsplash
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