The Treat

(x = space)

x

x

The Treat

x

One time

And a few more times

There were

Doughnuts

By Dolly Madison

Advertised during It’s the

Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

And other specials

x

There were eyeholes

We could barely see through

Well enough

But there were parents

And we did all right

And sometimes in other houses

There were scenes of

Evening parties we could see

(if not that well)

x

And there are photographs

Of a me I do not know

Because

I was on the inside

Trying to look through

And my imagination

Took me other places

Through the night

And the cold air

As I ran

To the next house

x

C L Couch

x

x

Photo by Vino Li on Unsplash

x

Cancerous

(x = space)

x

x

Cancerous

x

We’ve been five

Soon we will be four

That is the prognosis

Palliation

Hospice

These are discussed

And sought

For him

x

Out of order

Since he’s not the oldest

In mere math of life

It could have been me

I’m the one with the machine

To keep me going

But I guess

(today’s not over)

It’s not me

(for now)

x

The math doesn’t matter

Not important

Math matters elsewhere

In the dosage

Of his medication

In the number of his place

In the hospital

His apartment number

To which they say

He will not be returning

x

It’s not me

It’s him

He is important now

But I have to say

It’s been a problem all along,

Frankly, with me

I don’t know how to lose

A brother

x

And has he ever learned

To live with this

I’d say so

A mystery he did resolve

Through work

Through home

Maybe through old movies

He knows so well

x

And one day

All shall be all

God bless everyone

Who tries

Who’s trying now

One by one

Who practices with grace,

Each fitness for heaven

That shall be judged

By perfect love intending

Hoping that

Full health to be restored

x

God bless everyone

God bless each one

God bless Rick

x

C L Couch

x

x

Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash

x

Mystic Coffee

(x = space)

x

x

Mystic Coffee

x

What does God say

Today?

Not in the mystic sense

Or way

That I do not understand

Bur in a parochial,

Five-senses fashion

Over the sink

Or at the table

In front of this machine

Not to take over

As in a speculative episode

Simply to be here

I could try to keep

The holy fear

At bay

In order to entertain

If only with companionship

Unless God would like

Some coffee

Or cold water

x

Maybe so

Maybe God would like

Coffee or some water

In water, there are so many

Lessons

Though water can be water, too

x

As for coffee

It has been created

And remade

(we may ask how)

And so also has provenance

x

The day, the day

The hour

Without counting

We are here

God speaks

I listen

God asks me questions

Though God knows;

Shall I say anything,

I would not know

x

Maybe this is mystic

My senses would be frozen

Like the frost before the sunrise

God is God

Though God could warm me

I could try to talk,

Be thankful for

The perfect listening

x

C L Couch

x

x

Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash

x

See the Chill We Feel Outside in Fall

(x = space)

x

x

See the Chill We Feel Outside in Fall

x

I was out past midnight

When I left the store

I saw my breath in vapor

A little cloud

The first time in the season

x

Our fall has been too warm

But in the night

Beneath the parking spots

Outside the entryway

To Rutter’s

There was something

x

Evidence of exhalation

I am breathing

So are you

Breathing through

The midnight hour

x

C L Couch

x

x

Photo by Tanya Pro on Unsplash

Pechersk, Kyiv, Ukraine

x

Art Show

(x = space)

x

x

Art Show

x

My goodness,

It’s brilliant outside

The green has changed to red

Lit by the angles of

The sun’s afternoon

x

The larger trunks

Are tubes of transit

Moving our eyes

To the show

For which there’s no ticket

But the chilly air

(also a transiting device)

x

What is blue is blue

In the moment

Looking out and up

There is no impedance

From a cloud

Or interruption

Of a contrail

x

If there were

It would be a

Recipe’s ingredient:

Another element in

A complex design

x

It’s quiet through the window

There could be movement

But there isn’t any

Maybe to stay the moment

We may look longer

Let the silence

Stun the colors

x

Have this

As a MidAtlantic gift

Before a winter’s

Bareness calls,

Giving notice to

Another kind

Of traveling exhibit

x

C L Couch

x

x

Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash

x

the sadness before separation

(x = space)

x

x

the sadness before separation

x

fall will turn to winter

after the letting go

don’t go away

I must

there are things for me

on the other side

and I am called

I have been suffering

all that will change now

x

this is what to feel for now

the sadness before separation

it’s easier to say

for now

x

the greater pain is coming

the confusion of mortality

the letting go

x

c l couch

x

x

image by Wolfgang Eckert from Pixabay

x

The Latest

(x = space)

x

x

The Latest

(family things)

x

My brother’s in the hospital

I’m not sure what that means

He fell

I know that much

He spent the night outside,

Which I think must mean

There’s trauma

x

A body worked too hard

A body with cancer worked too hard

A neighbor saw him in the morning

And called 911

He’s hundreds of miles away

And he’s in the hospital

In downtown Pittsburgh

My sister says the hospital is good

Urban, smart, efficient

x

Everyone knows their jobs

And what to do for him

x

Now we know

We’re standing by

Something will happen

And we’ll all come in

It doesn’t have to take an ending

He simply needs to be in one place

Or another

For a time

x

What contemporary medicine allows

And Medicare affords

A rehab center

For new fractures

While his cancer’s tended

And he

And everyone

Must deal with that

x

We’ve been out there

When and where shall we go now?

x

I’ve rattled all this off

Because

I don’t know how to be ready

For what’s next

I wish I had resources

Of all kinds

x

Family things

Obviously

Certainly (to push on

the conceit) I don’t mind

If you know

x

If you pray,

Maybe you’ll pray

I believe the power in that

God bless him

And help us all

x

C L Couch

x

x

Photo by Marcelo Leal on Unsplash

x

dream state

(x = space)

x

x

dream state

x

shall I write on a dream?

dreams work out subconscious

so I guess there’s something there

in mine

in my dreams

there have been nightmares

mostly, I hope they’re good

while I’m inside

the world changes in there,

naturally

sometimes I know my way

sometimes that’s not an issue

it’s the people I encounter

from the past

from the present

people I do not know

as for color, I don’t know

we’re told we dream in black and white

so if I say that’s yellow

is the truth of it in what I see

or what I’ve convinced myself

I’m seeing?

dreams are strange

I guess I need them

they might have been the first visitations

formless forms given form,

hidden words revealed

all because we sleep

confusions for

an easy price

x

I’m thinking now

I should have made this formless

or changed the shape many times

or something

as a waking example

but then when I’m awake

like many who dream

and recall anything,

I’m trying to clarify

unlike a scientist

but one to whom

everything had happened

x

as far as I know,

I’ve never died in dreams

I’ve fallen without an ending

to the fall;

sometimes I’ve fallen and then flown

and, after, felt the use

between my shoulder blades,

the stiffness from the muscles there

that that would be needed

for the use of wings

x

sometimes I’m frightened, after

most often, I’m sad

sometimes nostalgic

warmth or sometimes hope

worked its way through

the pastiche

x

I don’t know

how God’s involved in dreams

mine are a mess:

I don’t see how

an angel as an agent

could be talking through them

but we have precedents

in messages of prophecy;

to have a dream with clarity

must be something

as impressive it must be

troubling,

a contemporary (waking)

source for fear and trembling

x

c l couch

x

x

photo by Tamara Menzi on Unsplash

x

Quiet Victory

(x = space)

x

x

Quiet Victory

x

There is yellow sunlight

On things this morning

Or is it gold

Or is it wishful thinking?

Church is going on

I’m trying to listen

The advantage and the irony

Of virtual

If I’m distracted

If I distract myself

It sticks

(the distraction)

x

(Saint) Paul is confessional

I think that’s good

I was thinking yesterday

Of (Saint) Peter

And his qualities to lead

That are pretty awful

He leads anyway

Jesus said so

Called him foundational

To a new movement,

A new church

x

We are flawed

And at our best

We do not deny our flaws

Because that is honest

Because vanity

And ego

Won’t win anything

The battle

Or the day

Or the age

Or the world

Or the cosmos

Better to be the silent planet

As Lewis has created

Until we speak in power

Due to love

And lead the battle

And the world

And the age

In love

x

C L Couch

x

x

Solar Eclipse

Photo by Obed Hernández on Unsplash

x